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You're not alone

Erection problems are much more common than you might think. 6 million men in the UK experience symptoms of erectile dysfunction (ED)* (the medical name for erection problems).

Some of the most common conditions and diseases that are linked to erectile dysfunction (ED) are ones that are also linked to lifestyle:

  • Cardiovascular disease
  • High blood pressure
  • Diabetes

Erection problems can also be caused by things that affect mental wellness, stress, anxiety and depression. EPs might be experienced regularly or just occasionally. In either case don't ignore them, as they could be a sign of an underlying health issue.

*Prevalence based on men (18 - 74yrs) with erection problem in the UK (Reference - IPSOS Healthcare KPI Tracking Study February 2022).

Shame and blame

Erection problems can make you feel ashamed, and even angry. Being the partner of someone experiencing EPs can also be challenging because they don't understand what's going on. Naturally enough, people start to wonder if it's their fault (it isn't).

This situation means there's a lot of scope for misunderstanding. That's why it's important for you and your partner to stay positive when you talk about your relationship and erection problems.

Choose your moment

Think about when and where you're going to talk to your partner.

Erection problems have everything to do with life getting in the way, so try and talk about them without interruptions: not when you're getting ready to go out, or over a meal, or when you've just put the TV on. Don't start the conversation when children, family or visitors are around, or when you might be distracted by phone calls.

Choose a neutral spot to talk — not in the bedroom, or where anything can distract you. Avoid situations in which you might feel exposed or vulnerable, for example when you're undressing for bed.

What to say

Think of this as a dialogue between two people who are both affected by erection problems. Think of it as the first step towards finding a solution. Together.

If you're going to talk about your EPs, start the conversation with the word 'we' e.g. 'We need to talk about my health', or 'We're going through something I think we should talk about'.

If you're the partner of someone with EPs, begin with 'I' e.g. 'I'm worried about how you're feeling'.

The important thing is to avoid using 'you' in an accusatory or confrontational way, as in 'You have a problem', or 'You don't find me attractive anymore'.

What to do if the conversation becomes difficult

There's no point denying it, this can be a challenging conversation. It might not go perfectly on the first attempt.

If you find things going badly, don't force it. Accept that now isn't the right moment and say you'd like to have this conversation soon. End things on a positive note so there's no lingering resentment when you try again.

Stay positive

Having a conversation about erection problems should mean the beginning of something better for both of you.

As well as talking things through together, speaking to someone trained to help men treat their EPs, like your doctor or pharmacist, is really straightforward.

If it ever seems too difficult and you're tempted to bury your head in the sand, remember: talking to your partner or speaking privately with a trained professional can put your love stary back on the right path.

VIAC-2024-0038 April 2024